The Best Policy

Two stories that have been getting a fair bit of attention today:

Rob Ford has been called out by the Toronto Police for acting in a disappointing way (i.e. taking illegal drugs and fraternizing with drug dealers) - and for lying about it.

Prime Minister Stephen Harper, on his way to Calgary for a Party Convention is being dogged by the Senate Scandal and the mounting improbability of his not having known what was going on before he said he did - (i.e. he lied about it).

Then there's story number three - how it is that Harper (and his Finance Minister) ended up at a media availability with Rob Ford while Ford was in the midst of scandal but before it was confirmed as legitimate, tainting his own brand.

All in all, not a good day for political trust-building in Canada.

There are plenty of differences between what's happening to Ford versus what's happening to Harper; while Harper is a workaholic whose vices appear limited to pop, hockey and spinning, Ford (as evidence demonstrates) is less committed to his day-job and, well, there's the crack and booze thing.

Where Ford seems to have been rather hands-on in the attempted cover-up of his crack-smoking video, Harper appears to have worked overtime to create a narrative of plausible deniability in relation to his Senate Scandal.

The key point Ford and Harper have in common is that they have been dishonest - likely with themselves as much as with the public.  At some point, both partook in acts they knew were inappropriate and, not wanting to face personal accountability for those acts, chose to lie about them.

Both men are now being haunted by their initial lapse of integrity and the subsequent spiral downward that has followed, catching more and more people up in their nets of deception.

Three lessons can be drawn from this.

First - there's a reason they say that honest is the best policy - because it is.  Lies are like rust, they can eat away at your reputation and your conscience (provided you're not a psychopath and don't have one).  Under pressure of cognitive dissonance they can be very tempting as quick-fixes, but that's like taking oxycontin to dull the pain caused by work stress - it doesn't solve the problem, it creates new ones.  Yes, people get away with lying all the time, but when you're in a position of power, when you intentionally withhold information pertinent to the public and when you act like a bully, that's a delusional risk to take.

Second - it's worth noting that Harper never planned to become a politician, he was coerced into it.  Throughout his time as PM he's said he doesn't enjoy the social aspects of the job, which, as communicator-in-chief and leader of the people are crucial.  Ford seemed content as a bullish Councillor and has never really changed his approach since becoming Mayor.  We hear, periodically, that people should pursue what they love, not what they find convenient.  That is particularly true for leaders.  There's no shame in not being a leader - few people truly are.  

Leadership isn't about power, but being a conduit for power; leadership isn't about what you gain, but what you give.  Being a leader is a noble sacrifice for the greater good; by the nature of the position, your own interests must come after everyone else's.

Third - it's crucial to have realistic expectations.  As a society, we don't.  Most of the time, we don't measure expectations by anything other than feeling, which are poor metrics.  We expect our leaders to be superhuman, our employees to be machines, our partners to be constantly exciting and our kids to be soldiers.  None of that is realistic.

People will present themselves as perfect, because they know that's what sells; in this way, pinning blame for your own mistakes is as narcissistic as demanding continuous compliments.  Other folk will consider themselves failures for not being unrealistically perfect.  

Based on what the three people who saw and described the Ford crack tape, the Mayor himself said something along the lines of "I'm supposed to be this Great Right..." Supposed to be, implying he knows he isn't.  What kind of internal dialogue do you think Ford had about what was expected of him vs. who he is and what he's capable of?  Could any of his bad behaviours have been attempts to escape that cognitive dissonance?

We're all human and must recognize each other as such.  Some people are short, some people are tall; some are good at math while others are natural athletes.  It's important to test ourselves in various fields (that's how we grow) but standardized standards only succeed in creating false expectations, to the detriment of all.

Now, let's do these in reverse:

- Set reasonable expectations as a whole and accept each other as human - do unto others, etc.

- to thine ownself be true; take the time to know who you are, who you aren't, and work consciously to be the best you possible.  I'll never be you as well as you can be, but with effort, I can become a better me.

- The truth will set you free.  It's a poorly understood cliche, because although we talk about accountability and transparency all the time, we never stop to consider the deeper meaning.  Truth is freedom from false expectation; truth removes the invisible bonds that shackle us in ignorance and keep us from reaching our full individual and collective potential.

The trick is being conscious of this underlying truth and acting in accordance with it.  Not any easy task, certainly, but fortunately, it's not one we're meant to complete alone.

UPDATE:  Whatever might be meant by Wright's later email to a colleague, that "the PM knows, in broad terms only, that I personally assisted Duffy when I was getting him to agree to repay the expenses," and regardless of the officer's statement, offered elsewhere, that "I have seen no evidence to suggest that the Prime Minister was personally involved in the minutae of those matters," it seems clear that he knew a great deal more than he has let on.  Which was, you will remember, nothing.

You can focus on circling the wagons and attacking your opponents, but when it's about crafted messages rather than sincere conversation, you're invariably going to say something that serves a purpose rather than represents the truth.  From there on in, you're trapped.

Which is why, as cliche a phrase as it is, the truth really does set you free.