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Recovering backpacker, Cornwallite at heart, political enthusiast, catalyst, writer, husband, father, community volunteer, unabashedly proud Canadian. Every hyperlink connects to something related directly or thematically to that which is highlighted.

Tuesday 2 October 2012

If Justin Trudeau is The White Knight - Does That Make Harper The Dark Knight?

In the Chris Nolan Batman movies, the White Knight was Harvey Dent - all charm, promise and vision ultimately done in by The Joker (I'm trying to picture Mulcair in that role - just not happening).  It was The Dark Knight that bore the weight of the dirty work, keeping internal and external bad guys at bay.  This kinda fits with the brand Harper has tried to paint for himself.
What kind of Batman would Harper make?
Picture our Prime Minister, working alone in his office when the CP-signal lights up the sky.  He stands, slowly removing his glasses.  "It's time.  Poilievre, warm up the f35!"  Harper takes the fireman's pole hidden in Langevin Block down to the CPC war room, and makes for the locker holding his cape and cowl. 

Loyal servant Poilevre briefs the Bat-Minister as he Walks-and-Stalks to the plane - Pauline Marois is holding another event sans the Maple Leaf!  "I'll look into it," says the Caped Legislator, as he throttles the ignition and blasts out of the hidden entrance overlooking the Rideau.  "Baird can go over the GG's head", he says to himself - "but I fly under it."
The Harper-plane swoops into Quebec, zeroing in on the rally.  People need dramatic examples to shake them out of socialist/separatist ways, Harper thinks to himself.  I can't do that as Prime Minister, but as an angry man in a cape... his Huawei-made tracking system shakes him out of his reverie as the convention centre looms ever closer.  Harper puts his f35 in hover mode (that's what's really been redacted) and readies his grappling gun. 
Marois steps out of the rally surrounded by a protective swarm of supporters.  It's no use.  Harper's precision shot tags the Quebec Premier in the leg, hooking her pants.  Before she can even scream, Marois is hoisted into the air where the Bat-Minister waits.  He wastes no time on pleasantries.
"Where is the Maple Leaf?" he growls at the terrified, upside-down Premier.
"I'm sorry!" she cries in desperation, blood rushing to her head. "I'll bring it next time!  I swear, to Canada!"
"Swear to me!" comes the guttural reply. 
With no time for questions, the conversation is over; Marois drops swiftly to the ground as the Harperplane disappears into the darkness.  Somewhere out there, Harper muses, Justin Trudeau is planning the destruction of his Canada.  There is still work to be done.

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